First World Memoir Problems

Ever wish you could write a memoir? Think about how you would portray your exes, not the lying, cheating whores, but the nice ones. Remember that if this damn thing sees the light of day not only will said exes read this, but probably your boss and your husband’s mom as well.

I don’t really want to talk about them at all. But I’m trying to create a portrait of a period of my life, and who I was dating or pining after was part of that. I dealt with one of them easily and with glee: slap a very irritating name on him and write concisely about how he was the wrong man at the wrong time, that is, how he did me wrong.

But the others? Do I write about how vulnerable I felt at the time? Do I write coolly about them, because now I’m all settled and happy? Probably not. I think I have to go back into that icky territory and give them the power yet again to hurt me.

What are your writing problems?


14 responses to “First World Memoir Problems

  1. What’s that old adage about distance and perspective? You may find yourself back there but you won’t just be reliving the experience. You’ll be writing about it which, by its very nature, will release you.

    My problem lies in trying to find a way to make my personal experience a collective one.

    • “She understood through writing what real ‘knowing’ was, not because she got the facts down, but because she had never before really assigned or clarified the emotion held inside those memories for her.”

      Thanks, D, that last bit really speaks to me.

      • That quote is just perfect. I have no interest in writing a memoir but I think it relates to fiction as well, “clarified the emotion held inside those memories”, what a wonderful bubble of an image.

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