Anti-Acknowledgments

You remember the anti-resume? It was a list of all your rejections. I’d like to propose the idea of anti-acknowledgments.

I’d like to acknowledge my current editing job that has fucked up my previously solid idea of whether anti- is hyphenated, set open, or closed up. I’d like to thank my parents for getting sick and dying and fucking up my twenties and early-to-mid thirties right good. I’d like to acknowledge person A and B for keeping me single long enough that I could concentrate on developing my writing. I’d like to thank my friends for showing impatience the twenty-five-thousandth time I told a story, so I turned to writing instead.

I’d like to acknowledge my stark raving ADD for my “lyric” style. I’d like to thank my shitty memory for also contributing to my lyrical, vignette-y style. I’d like to thank the lack of confidence that made me work on the memoir rather than essays so I wouldn’t have essays to send out and get rejected. I’d like to thank my shitty life choices that lead me to rely on writing as the overarching path to self-esteem. Without you I’d be nothing.

What would you like to anti-acknowledge today?

Advertisements

11 responses to “Anti-Acknowledgments

  1. I’d like to thank that @$$hat in my old critique group who told me point blank that no one would ever care about what I was writing about; since then, I’ve been able to categorically dismiss that particular self-doubt as an @$$hat’s opinion.

  2. This is weird Indy. But, I guess “acknowledge” doesn’t quite mean “thank,” right?

    Like, “i’d like to acknowledge the pogroms, without which our ancestors might not have fled, and ended up in California, and mom and dad wouldn’t have met, and you and me, baby, well, we wouldn’t be”?

    OK then, well, I’d like to acknowledge:
    – death and illness without which I wouldn’t have anything to lecture and write about.
    – climate change which is bringing me closer to my polynesian neighbours who are going to move to [my country, I hope] when their islands are under water.
    – advancing age which makes me run so much slower, and hurts my back, because it pushed me towards mountain biking instead, and that makes me such a bad ass!
    – my mother and father for making one last daughter (as if 3 weren’t already enough!) (even if people used to think I was her teen-aged mother when I was carrying her around) (when they were practically grandparents anyway) so that she can write this weird blog to keep me entertained

    happy?

    PS-everything OK today?
    PPS- I think I just saw Sarah W!

  3. It’s probably best if I don’t speak of the things in my life that I ought to thank for making me the way I am now. (At least to anyone who is not a licensed therapist.)

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s