Morgan Freeman Would Be Proud

I am enamored of Brevity’s post today. Williams posits that we should be able to frame our elevator (ahem, Downith) speech in terms of a movie preview. Cue Morgan Freeman and something scenic:

Screen Shot 2015-05-18 at 10.38.28 AM

I’m in love with this idea now that I’m in the phase where I really should have an elevator speech.

Couple my enthusiasm with the fact that my very own Cougar is coming to visit. (That didn’t come out right, let me try that again.) Couple my enthusiasm with the fact that my very own second sister is coming to visit, I think it’s time to have a contest.

Don’t you?

Give me the best movie preview of your Fucker or your life in the comments below. Cougar and I will judge together probably over drinks. (You think we’re nuts sober?) Submit early, submit often, lie or tell the truth, bottles of whiskey (me) or Scotch (her) are acceptable bribes.

In a world where one Clause is enough for any normal human being, what if there were two (or four)?


10 responses to “Morgan Freeman Would Be Proud

  1. Can’t sleep. It’s 4AM in [name of country redacted] and there’s too much to do. Am going to see Indy this week (as she said), and can’t wait!

    Bet you wonder what she looks like. I know (unless she has changed). Looks just like….me!

  2. In a world where no one can pronounce her name properly, how will what’s her name avoid therapy?

    In a world where I spend too much time wailing and gnashing my teeth, how will I ever finish the Fucker?

    In a world – OH MY GOD these are addictive.

    • In a world filled with eager writers jostling for their fifteen minutes of fame, Paul has no elevator speech. Instead he keeps his chin down, runs a few more miles, and types a few more words.

  3. In a world . . . where I have two kids and a full-time job, I’ve taken on a PhD, which I must use all of my free-time that–oh wait!–does not exist to finish the thesis (a.k.a. The Fucker) or bring shame upon myself and anger to my long-suffering family.

    • In a world . . . where I am an English teacher, I am regularly embarrassed when I make errors in public (such as the unnecessary hyphen in “free time” above).

      • In a world where I am paid to correct text, I am uninterested in doing it for free.

        In a world where she is paid to edit text for accuracy, Indy Clause is embarrassed at how often she fucks up her own prose.

  4. Aren’t you supposed to be writing a new post which celebrates the arrival of your big sister, Dr. Cougar, and which describes, in witty prose that our idea of retrouvailles is for you and dog to lounge on my bed in one direction, me in the other direction, trying to find a synonyms for “adumbrate” (a word I taught you, dear Indy, even though it was a copyeditor who taught it to me!)?

    Readers, she hasn’t given me any maple sugar candy yet. That would have been AS important as synonyms…

  5. Pingback: Elevator Speeches | Fangs and Clause

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