Roller Coaster

The weather is unsettled and so am I. Spectacular thunderstorms, blooming shrubs, sunny days, sullen days, warm, cold, windy, rain, and that’s just this morning.

My brain is equally disordered. Sit down and work on freelance stuff. Go for a walk, depending on weather. Work on the MS. Feel like a genius, giddy, this book might be finished at some point. Hit the bottom. So much work left to do.

I’ve tried distracting myself with printing The Fucker out and buying brightly colored pens to mark it up. I’ve worked, despaired, taken a nap, raged, worked, and despaired.

Tell me I’m not alone. What’s your chaos?


9 responses to “Roller Coaster

  1. My chaos was last night. Trying to wrap my head around Physics (which I have never studied) to “help” my 12 year old get ready for her test. AAUGH.

    Coloured pens always help, especially with purple prose 😉

    Your book will be finished at some point. And soon.

  2. I just told the dear helpful soul who offered to read my story, before the contest deadline, that I felt like sandpaper was running around under my skin. I had to sell my house to pay off debts. Now the closing is dragging, I don’t drive, and I have to depend on people who have their own problems and have never been much interested in mine to take care of and deliver things I would gladly pick up myself, if only I could.

    It doesn’t help that my two closest family members, who should know better, have said that none of this is really such a big deal and I should chill out. (I left out a bunch of details that you just don’t want to know.) I’m waiting for phone calls now, and trying to make the sandpaper be still. I’m surprised I’m working on the story in the midst of all this. Betting on whatever talent I may have is the sort of thing I usually let go of when I feel this way. I’m grateful for that, and that the house actually sold.

    • Oh I know that feeling. Ugh, I’m so sorry.

      Work on the story and whatever else makes the sandpapery feeling go away. (For me, sometimes, walks help, or really, being outside.)

      Selling your house is a really big deal. And waiting for phone calls just sucks.

    • Being able to write about feeling like sandpaper under your skin demonstrates what a superior sort of person you are. Who would have known how to describe such feelings but a superior person? I bet your story is tops!

  3. Indy, they makes these things that I bought once in England that you might want to have (they probably exist in the US as well. I’ve never seen them in [name of country redacted]). Instead of putting coloured ink all over your manuscript, you can put different-coloured transparent post-it things that are as narrow as 14 pt. font and comes in strips.

    The advantages?:

    1) it makes it look like you have a really steady hand and that you highlighted your manuscript with a pen
    2) looking like you have a steady hand is a kind of behavioural therapy (if you act steady, you might become steady)
    3) you can remove them when you decide what you thought you should highlight needn’t be highlighted any more.


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